All righty here’s the deal. It’s Friday, lately that means it’s Fuck it Friday! It won’t always be that way so don’t give me any lip about it. If this is your first time visiting my blog then you need to hit up the read me and the disclaimer over to the left. You might also want to read some of the archives or come back next week as FiF shouldn’t be the post that introduces you to me. If you’re sensitive, offended by foul language, under the age of 18, easily offended, or especially offended by anything I say because it hits too close to home for you then why the fuck are you here anyway? Fuck you in ass and hit bricks!
Fuck Farmer Jack for still not programming their bottle return to take my cans! Fuck the cashier who said we don’t sell those here. It’s on the damn shelf bitch so yes the fuck you do sell it! Besides who the fuck would try to cheat your ass out of $1.20. If I really wanted to get over on you trust me, I could.
Fuck people who are too afraid to answer a fucking meme honestly!
Fuck that there hasn’t been many interesting memes lately!
I would like to extend a very personal fuck you to the thirsty asshole who hit up my page twice on Tuesday for all of 15 seconds combined, just to hit up someone on my blog roll! Bookmark her blog you lazy fucking bastard! I’m going to start putting you cocksuckers on blast, posting IP addresses, and talking about how much of my semen some of your family members have ingested if you niggers keep irritating me!
Fuck people who are always scared but refuse to do anything to overcome any of their fears! Pussies!
Fuck that I don’t know many, good and/or honorable men! Fuck that even if one wanted to be my friend, I probably wouldn’t trust him enough to ever give him the chance!
Fuck not having what I want or need emotionally and physically! Fuck all the people not giving me those things! Violently fuck all the people who ever said they would and didn’t!
Fuck 30 year old grandparents! At least three generations of your family either needed or still need an old fashioned ass whoopin’!
Fuck people who say they don’t judge a book by it’s cover and the first thing out of their shallow and judgmental mouths after saying it is about how someone looks! He was ugly. She stank. He looked dusty. She was big as hell. Just remember that no matter how good you look or how many horny and drunken members of the opposite sex blow you up there will always be someone that doesn’t find you attractive and isn’t feeling you.
Fuck people online who start drama and act like an asshole under one username and then want to be all sweet and nice under their other username! You act like a fucking Internet Gemini and think I can’t tell the difference or know any better but I can and I do.
Fuck people who argue with you on your blog about something you said! If I argued with people every time I read something on their blogs I didn’t agree with or thought was complete and utter bullshit then I’d be an arguing ass. If I don’t have anything nice to say then I just say nothing and leave or blog about it in MY own blog. What’s the point of arguing? I mean if it’s a factual point you’re arguing about like say I said, raspberry walnut was the most popular ice cream flavor then I can see it. If it’s my opinion that Yugo’s are a piece of crap what good is arguing with me about it going to do? I don’t give a fuck if you drive one! I don’t give a fuck if you know the owner or if your family owns the company! I don’t even give a fuck if you think my opinion is ridiculous, stupid, or even offensive to you! It does nothing to change my opinion. I’m not doing a persuasion speech so I’m not trying to win you over and get you to agree with me. I just say what I’m thinking and feeling. If you don’t agree with it that’s cool. If you want to argue about it then fuck you everyday of the week and fuck you twice on Fuck it Friday!
Fuck people who normally comment and run but will blow up your hit counter to check back if you responded to their attempts to keep you in an argument they won’t let die! If you want my attention that damn badly then make me cum or volunteer to be my sugar mama! Sex and money usually gets my attention save all that arguing for your baby’s daddy.
Fuck that my birthday sucks so fucking bad every year that I prayed to be dead before the next one so that I never have to experience that same resentment, disappointment, sadness, frustration, and anger ever again! Fuck people violently in the ass that say well why don’t you do something about it?! Has it ever occurred that some things are even out of the great and mighty Freaky Deaky’s control? Maybe it wouldn’t suck so fucking much if anyone besides me gave a fuck about the day not sucking! Fuck that even though I said I wouldn’t wish for death on my birthday this year I’ll be thinking about it and at least part of me hopes I drop dead right then and there! Fuck it that at best I can only hope that my birthday is boring and only mildly disappointing and sucky! Otherwise I’m not being realistic and only setting myself up for more hurt and disappointment.
Fuck that I know people within a few years of my age that have five or more kids and I don’t even have one!
Fuck everybody who has ever used the term “red Kool-Aid” to describe a flavor instead of the color! There is no such flavor as red Kool-Aid! Please stop this madness. When you don’t pour 2.5 lbs of sugar into it Kool-Aid usually has a discernable flavor. Trust me, I know that which I rant about.
Fuck that I tend to want who and what I can’t have!
Fuck everybody who used to come around here but don’t anymore!
Fuck you in perpetuity to any and all of my lurkers/blog stalkers!
Fuck people trying to play with my horniness!
Fuck those “not feeling fresh” and feminine hygiene commercials! Why the fuck are you smiling and so happy when you just revealed to your mom, girlfriends, or whoever that you have a stank pussy? If my balls smelled like red snapper I sure as hell wouldn’t have a smile on my face. Unless you had the letters M.D. after your name you’re probably not on the list of people I’d even reveal that too. I wonder if the actresses ever get clowned by people or accused of having a stank puss in real life?
Fuck females who don’t want you pushing down on their heads when sucking your dick but will try to push your head all up in their pussies even when you’re about to black out from a lack of oxygen! Besides skeeting in your mouth that’s one of the non-verbal ways we tell you it feels good.
Fuck women with furry beavers! Fuck you with the big toe of my right foot if you seriously expect me to fight through your jungle of pubic hair to find your clit or anything else to lick and suck on! Throat all sore because some of your coarse and nasty ass pubic hair has lodged in my throat. Do you know how hard it is to cough that shit up or dislodge it?
Fuck people who say a bald pussy makes women look like little girls! If that’s the case let me know and I’ll change my name from Freaky Deaky to Chester, Chester child molester. At the very least comb out and trim that nappy shit down!
Fuck every broad who has ever bragged to me about her head skills and couldn’t keep my dick hard or even make me cum and had the nerve to complain about other people lying on their skills! What the fuck ever! That works both ways. I wonder if they ever brag about how bored I was when I consoled them about not being able to make me cum? Kind of doubt it.
Fuck women who want to cum in my face but don’t want me giving them a facial! It’s in you or on you in Freakytopia, fuck what you’re thinking or heard! A little soap and water washes off liquid Freaky just fine so quit your bitching!
Fuck chicks with pictures of themselves half naked or worse on the Internet talking about how righteous and sanctified they are! Now if there’s a Church of Hoeology out there I just have two questions. How do I sign up and can I be your Pope or at least a High Priest? I can get with thou shalt dress like a slut and thou shalt act like a hoe.
Fuck the pickle jar that was so hard to open I contemplated cutting the fucking top off of it! I swear I pulled something in my jacking off hand because it was sore for days. Sam’s Club isn’t playing with that big ass pickle jar! They’re so lucky I didn’t have to sic Dewey, Cheatum, & Howe on them because if my masturbatory habits were significantly altered because of that damn jar Sam’s Club and Vlasic would be providing me a hand double or a lot of fucking money.
Fuck people buzzing the wrong apartment! Reading is fundamental dumbass! It’s not my job to accept packages, let you in, or anything else. Of course if you have an ass that jiggles like Jell-O and thighs made for me to lick, nibble on, bruise, and submit between, then certain exceptions can and probably will be made.
Fuck everyone who reads one of these fuck it blurbs and basically responds by telling me that they’re what I just said fuck it about! And? Am I supposed to suddenly realize the error of my ways? Not today motherfuckers!
Fuck everybody who thinks today is the perfect day to do whatever loud ass chore they could’ve and should’ve done on any other weekday!
Fuck my sister and brother-in-law for giving my dog some ham and complaining about the foul odors emanating from her ass! I still lubs my puppy girl stanky ass farts and all. Okay maybe not the farts.
Fuck people who only come around to get you to visit their blog and drive up hits or their comment count!
Fuck hotels that don’t have free Internet access! You can get stains galore on your pillows and sheets but no free Net access? 🙁
Fuck the world and everybody in it!