Yep or nope meme

I stole this from my Blogger Babies’ Mama (http://coming-into-my-own NULL.blogspot NULL.com/) who got it from another blogger called Karsh (http://www NULL.blackgayblogger NULL.com/). Originally it was called the Yay or Nay meme but who really says yay or nay? So I changed it to yep and nope. As usual, I’m not tagging anyone because some you are funny acting.

* I am shorter than 5’5″: Nope. I’m 6 feet. I wish I was three inches taller but at least most chicks I know can’t call me shortie or lil fella.

* I have many scars: Not really sure. Most of them are from when I had chicken pox as a preteen. For some reason my doctor thought it was funny to see a 13 year old in there with chicken pox. I didn’t quite find it so funny when I learned one of the possible side effects of having it at that age was sterility. Although technically, I think those are more considered blemishes than scars. I have a couple of scars on my legs but that’s about it.

* I tan easily: Nope. I definitely get darker during the summer though. I actually wished I was still light bright like I was when I was a toddler. Oh well.

* I wish my hair was a different color: Yep. Well, black people for the most part get stuck with the standard black hair and brown eyes combination. I wish my hair was naturally brown or something but it’s whatever, I guess. I’m resigned to it.

* I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color: Nope.

* I’ve had braces: Nope. I probably could use some but I’m straight.

* I wear glasses or contacts: Yep. I wear glasses, never really much cared for contacts. I’ve only managed to put them in by myself twice and even when they were in they just didn’t feel right. Plus the whole having to take them out before you go to sleep and the maintenance required more thought then I care to expend on them.

* I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger: Yep, not that often because apparently women can’t be bothered to do it or I just attract emotionally unavailable attention whores and I’ve been told that I look mean too. Every now and then a chick who isn’t my girlfriend gives me a compliment or two.

* I have freckles: Nope.

* I’ve fallen asleep at work or school: School? Yep. Work? Nope. The yes only counts if you include nap time during the early years. No matter how tired I am I’ve always had problems and find it difficult to sleep anywhere other than my home or my ride.

* I failed more than 1 class: Yep. Not because the class or work was too difficult for me to grasp or anything. If I’m not motivated or stimulated by the class then I’m not inclined to mentally exert myself at all. I stopped caring about perfect g.p.a.’s after middle school. If I’m not having fun or stimulated then nothing in the world is that serious to me.

* I’ve been fired: Yep. Once again it comes down to motivation, well at least partially. There’s only so hard I plan on working for any company that I’m not part owner of. I also don’t particularly want to deal with the public as I’m a misanthrope and pretty much hate mankind in general. I love the management side of business but I have never and never will believe that the customer is always right, especially if it means that I’m wrong. Fuck’em!

* Disney movies still make me cry: Nope. Well, honestly I should say not really. I haven’t seen one in awhile. Although, I’m much more likely to tear up at a cartoon then I am during a live action tearjerker.

* I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried: Yep. Usually, I’m the one that makes people laugh so hard it hurts even though I don’t think I’m as naturally funny as some people claim I am. My boy “D.” and some comedians do make me laugh until I cry and my jaw and ribs ache.

* I’ve glued my hand to something: Yep. Not anytime recently but I have glued things to my fingers and even glued my fingers together before. It’s no biggie though.

* I’ve laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose: Yep. I think it’s kind of sad if you haven’t had that happen to you before. I already know when some people tell stories that it’s best to put the beverages down and wait until they’re done. I’ve had a few beverages come out of nose and sometimes even went back down. Not very pleasant and the fact that you’re laughing while it happens is just another slap in the face.

* I’ve had my pants rip/drop in public: Yep. I’ve had both happen. I haven’t ripped my pants in any embarrassing places in awhile. However, the pants dropping thing happened a few weeks ago while I was lugging in a haul from Targass. Luckily I was in the house and the door was almost completely shut before my pants fell around my ankles.

* I’ve had my tonsils removed: Nope. The last time I had a strep throat the doctors told my mom that we should consider getting them removed. I’ve never had it again after that.

* I’ve sat in a doctors office with a friend: Nope. I don’t want to sit in the office for my own damn self so why the fuck would I go with a friend? I’ve sat with family but unless someone is having major surgery or a major scare, then I try to stay away from doctors whenever possible.

* I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed: Nope. I have my wisdom teeth for now. I may get them removed one day but they’re not bothering me right now so if they don’t fuck with me then I won’t fuck with them.

* I had a serious surgery: Nope. I’ve had a procedure that I guess is technically considered surgery but I’ve never been cut open or anything like that.

* I’ve had chicken pox: Yep. Scroll up because I’m not going to repeat it again.

* I’ve gotten lost in my city: Yep. I get lost in a particular section of my city all the time. I call it the Twilight Zone. Now because I always get lost there, women that want to be given their doctor recommended liquid Freaky injections have to live there. I’m crossing my fingers that I’ll get a sugar mama or earn enough money manhoeing to get a GPS system so I can say goodbye to ever being lost again.

* I’ve seen a shooting star: Yep. I’ve seen a few shooting stars before. The last one I saw was in 2006 while taking out the trash one night. It’s a cool sight to see.

* I’ve wished on a shooting star: Yep. Why look at them if you’re not going to take the time to wish on them?

* I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas: Nope. I’ve thrown on some clothes over my pajamas so I can save a couple of steps when I got back home but to just go out shopping, for example, in one’s PJ’s is just trifling and tacky as all fuck.

* I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator: Yep. I haven’t done that since living in a high rise. There’s really no reason to do it other than to be annoying and an ass. Well, what can I say sometimes I like to be annoying and an ass.

* I’ve been to a casino: Yep. I’ve been to a casino in Niagara Falls, across the river in Windsor, and to one of the three casinos in Detroit. I’ll get around to the other two casinos here one of these days. I’m not really a big gambler. Once my predetermined play money is gone then I bounce. I got carded the last time I went to the casino. What’s up with that?

* I’ve been skydiving: Nope. However, it is something I’ve actually thought about and want to do.

* I’ve drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour: Nope. I may have drank a quarter of a gallon in a sitting. I don’t feel like figuring out what the name of the actually measurement is. I’m sure the lushes, non-Americans, and science type people would know. I’ve wanted to try that but as far as I know if you drank that much milk in that period of time you’d soon be puking it up. I’ve seen people try it before.

* I’ve been in a car crash: Yep. Every crash I was in was due to the negligence of the other driver. Sometimes I wish it was socially acceptable to be a woman beater because I would’ve loved to beat every last one of them for the time, trouble, and raised premiums they caused.

* I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue: Yep. I’ve also written my name in the snow without using my hands. And?

* I’ve sat on a roof top at night: Nope. Unless it’s one of those flat roofs why the fuck would I want to do that? That’s dangerous.

* I’ve played chicken: Yep. When I was braver and a kid. Then again if you count blocking someone from merging in front of you then I still play it regularly.

* I’ve played a prank on someone: Yep. I used to be very much a prankster growing up. I still do it from time to time.

* I’ve seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show: Yep. I’ve seen it. I don’t get why it’s considered a cult classic and I’ve never went to a midnight showing dressed in drag to see it. It’s okay but it ain’t Star Wars.

* I’ve eaten Sushi: Eew! Nope. That shit is disgusting. I don’t like fish. I don’t like seafood in general, even the smell of it makes me nauseous, so why the hell would I eat that garbage raw?

* I’ve been snowboarding: Yep. Not seriously with a snowboard because they weren’t out when I was a kid but I’ve done something similar on a sled in my youth.

* I’ve had a crush on a teacher: Yep. Considering how I had a propensity for being the teacher’s pet, I’m kind of hurt that I’m too old to enjoy and take part in the whole having sex with a hot teacher teacher illegally thing. Now I just have to find someone going into teaching and find a way to push up inside her while role playing.

* I’ve hugged a stranger: Nope. Technically, once you’re introduced you’re no longer strangers. I’ve been hugged by strangers before.

* I own over 5 rap CDs: Yep. I own many more than five.

* I own multiple designer pants and shirts, costing over $100 piece: Nope. I’m not into clothes like that. I’ve seen some things in that price range and even higher that I’d rock but until I get my sugar mama or manhoeing picks up I can’t see myself doing it.

* I own something from Hot Topic: Nope. Until I looked at the website a minute ago I thought it was a chick store.

* I own something from Pac Sun: Nope. I’ve never even heard of the place.

* I own something from The Gap: Nope.

* I own something from Abercrombie: Nope.

* I can sing well: Nope. I can’t hold a pitch, carry a note, or even seriously entertain the thought of singing without bringing shame to myself and my ancestors. I’ve threatened to make a duet CD for my mom’s birthday with my sister before. My sister can’t sing either but has trouble believing that when our ears bleed and the dogs howl that it means we’re in pain and not appreciative of her vocal stylings. I guess she thinks denial is a river in Africa.

* I’ve stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant: Nope. How baggy are your clothes or oddly shaped are you to be able to pull that off? Why the hell would you even want to?

* I open up to others easily: Nope. I have serious trust and abandonment issues so I don’t open up easily to most people. In fact, I have a tendency of putting up all kinds of walls, barriers, defenses, and pushing people away that start to get too close to me. You can get to know me but you’re going to have to put in some work in order to do so. No one gets a free pass into my life or my heart.

* I watch the news: Yep. I also read magazines, newspaper, and news sites online. It saddens me how ignorant and out of touch some people are about the world and even what’s going on in their own backyard. My high school history teacher got me into the news because he believed that you can’t truly call yourself intelligent and enlightened if you’re uninformed and don’t even try to figure out what’s going on.

Too many people use the “news is depressing” line as an excuse. Skip the whole who got raped and shot thing and inform yourself on science, technology, politics, or something else. It truly saddened me that some people, grown Americans, didn’t even know who the fuck Ed Bradley was but can tell you all about the latest asinine dance, degrading song, gossip, and beef about some no talent studio R&B or rap thug. [Shaking my head.] Do better people.

* I don’t kill bugs: Nope. Are you serious? Hell no. My motto is see a bug kill a bug find that bug’s family and kill those sons of bitches too. I’m the Adolf Hitler and Dr. Mengele of killing bugs.

* I sing in the shower: Yep. I do it sometimes although I’m more likely to try to bust a freestyle rhyme than sing.

* I am a morning person: Nope. I’m so not a morning person. I piss on morning people. It’s just not right being that damn happy, chipper, and talkative that damn early in the morning. Shut the fuck up and stay the hell away from me until at least 10:00am and if you really want to be safe then make it noonish.

* I am a sports fanatic: Nope. I like the local teams especially when they’re doing well but I”m honestly not into sports like that. I can’t quote player stats or even tell you what formation the team is setting up let alone a formation designed to counter it.

* I twirl my hair: Nope. You do realize I’m male, right? I also don’t have bangs, wear a perm, or beads and barrettes either. I don’t have any hair long enough to twirl.

* I’ve copied more than 30 CD’s in a day: Nope. Shit, why not just ask if I’m a bootlegger while you’re at it. Anyone who copies that many CDs in a day should be ready to have federal agents kicking in his/her front door one of these days.

* I bake well: Nope. I can pretty much cook what I like and make it so that it looks, smells, and tastes acceptable to me but I like simple stuff. I wouldn’t try to cook a family meal or even attempt cooking a romantic dinner or anything like that though.

* My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, red or blue: Nope. Out of the colors mentioned blue is my favorite. It’s one of my favorites in general but overall if I had to pick an absolute favorite based on the color of things I own then my favorite color would be either black or silver.

* I sometimes wear pajamas to school: Nope. What the fuck is this person’s obsession with pajamas? Panties I can understand but pajamas? Come the fuck on! No! Any school with a damn dress code would send your pajama clad ass right back home.

* I like Martha Stewart: Yep. I think she’s the shit actually. I think her voice and the controlled way in which she speaks is kind of hot. I’d definitely like to have a phone bone session with her. I also have a fantasy of being dominated by her in a threesome with Oprah Winfrey. I’m serious.

* I know how to shoot a gun: Yep. It’s pretty much aim and shoot. I’ve held and shot off a few. I’d definitely like to have a gun collection one of these days.

* I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS: Hell naw! I had to break from the yep and nope format for a minute. I despise people that type like that. If you’re over the age of 13 and type like that then line up so I can slap you with my still pissing dick. For real.

* I laugh at my own jokes: Yep. Sometimes the things that come out of my mouth are funny as hell. Why shouldn’t I laugh?

* I am really ticklish: Nope. I’m not normally ticklish at all. I taught myself not to be. Tickling traditional spots like the soles of my feet, under my arms, and my sides won’t make me laugh. I’m still aware of the sensations but it doesn’t make me laugh, giggle, chuckle, or anything else. Being kissed by my dog sometimes however is very ticklish to me. So much so that I’ll be reduced to laughing like a preschooler.

* I love chocolate: Yep. Although, I no longer have a constant sweet tooth. I usually have something chocolaty around.

* I bite my nails: Nope. If I don’t have any nail clippers or even scissors in a pinch then yeah, I’ll bite my nails if the need arises.

* I play video games: Yep. I haven’t played any recently. I’ve been meaning to but just haven’t found the time to when I’ve actually had a desire to. The last game I played was Resident Evil 4. I think I’m halfway through it but got stuck. Not enough health or ammo to beat the boss I need to and I don’t have any cheat codes to help or feel like starting over from the beginning yet.

* I’m good at remembering faces: Nope. I’ve had more than a few people stop me and wonder why I didn’t say hi and looked at them like they were crazy or some kind of stalker because they’d mention someone I know and I still had no idea who the hell they were. Sometimes I still don’t remember them even when they say their names.

* I’m good at remembering names: Yep. I’m okay at remembering names. It’s saved my ass quite a few times when I was caking.

* I’m good at remembering dates: Nope. Birthdays, anniversaries, etc. are things I’m prone to forget. It’s not personal, dates just don’t stick in my mind. If you don’t remember when our anniversary is I can damn near guarantee you that I won’t. So if it’s important to you then write it down and remind me often.

* I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life: Yep. However to be honest I can’t think of anything I want to do for the rest of my life besides eating, sleeping, fucking, relaxing, and having fun.

* My answers are totally honest: Yep. Why wouldn’t they be?

Author: Freaky Deaky I'm a horny, opinionated, smart-ass, antisocial, introverted, misanthropic, agnostic, nonconformist, free thinking, hedonistic, highly intelligent, and arrogant black man with a dirty mind.