Give sleep a chance

What’s up boys and girls?  Not a damn thing here!  The 4th of July was pretty much the bore of July for me.  My sister is stinky poopy head and didn’t cook so no burgers for me.  Since she didn’t have the usual holiday get together I also didn’t get to see Little Miss Short Shorts.  I can only imagine what itty bitty and/or tight outfit she would’ve worn but since there was no BBQ it was all for naught and I got no eye candy.  Thanks for nothing little sister!  Well at least I don’t have to drive her to the airport tomorrow.  She’s going to drive down to Atlanta for her best friend’s birthday. Apparently she changed her mind yet again and is going to fly.  Oh well, I’m assuming she found another ride to the airport.  I wish one of my best friends lived in a strip club or on the set of a porno so I could visit him or her and have a good old time.  Oh well.

She won’t be the only one getting out of the Mitten.  On Friday, I’ll be taking my trusty brick (Detroit style bitches) and making my triumphant return to Parts Unknown for a few weeks.  I still haven’t decided if I’m bringing my laptop with me.  Either way I should have access to a computer.  I’m just not sure if or how often I’ll be blogging.  I haven’t worked that out yet.  Hell, I haven’t even packed yet.  Guess I should get on that soon.  Normally I just do a carryon but since I’ll be there for awhile I’ll probably bring more clothes than normal.  Considering I’ll more than likely have to do the slave march Friday at Parts Unknown Airport I’m not sure I want to fuck with checking a bag in.  So many things, so little time.

I went to look for something to fix my bluetooth headset.  The rubber that goes around the speaker disintegrated.  I’ve only found one potential solution online but I’m not too sure about it.  The company that makes the headset knows about the problem but doesn’t offer a replacement piece for free or for sale currently.  That’s just stupid.  So either I have to search for something that may or may not do or buy a new headset.  If I do I definitely won’t get anything else from BlueAnt.  I walked into Radio Shack and the salesman was talking about the fires in California.  He didn’t understand why anyone would live out there between the earthquake that will eventually destroy the whole state and possibly part of the region and the fires.  He also forgot about the mudslides and the cyclones too.  I kid, mostly.  It’s way too expensive for me.  I watch the real estate shows and here some of the prices for 800 square feet houses and just laugh like a crazy man.  I don’t give a fuck if it has a direct view into Rihanna and Mariah’s bedrooms those prices are ridiculous. He seemed more disgusted than sympathetic about the people affected by the situation.  They probably say the same thing when we get ice storms and blizzards.

They didn’t have the earpiece I was looking for so I looked at some phones.  I’ll definitely have something new by the end of the year.  My mom keeps mentioning the iPhone.  She knows how much I used to drool over that phone.  I wouldn’t refuse it if she got me one for my birthday.  I’m not really sure how well it handles texting but if any of you know then please chime in and fill me in.  The salesman starts trying to sell me on a phone.  He asks who I currently have and makes a disapproving face when I saw T-Mobile.  There phones are on the ugly side but their plans are straight.  He tells me if I’m on a family plan that I should go with AT&T (I will if I get that iPhone although I’m not sure about their rate plans) and if I’m just doing one phone that I should go with Sprint.  He tells me for $99 I can pretty much do everything on a phone.  I still don’t think cell phones are ready for prime time yet and I just don’t need or want to talk, text, send pictures, or watch TV on a tiny ass screen that much to justify the price.  I did see some remote control toys I’d like but some of them had gun shaped controllers and I figured having a gun shaped anything in my bag would be more trouble than it’s worth at the airport.  Although I’m sure Cletus wouldn’t mind conducting the strip search.

I’ve slept like crap for the past few days.  Since I got to bed late and really wanted to sleep in on Monday (it was muggy as fuck but not warm enough to warrant the a/c) I knew that would be the day Hector, Carlos, Jesus, and them decide to do landscaping.  Sure enough those annoying bastards were outside my window with gas powered lawn equipment annoying the holy shit out of me.  I knew it would happen as I laid in bed with a stiff dick, full bladder, and bleary eyes.  If I beleived in god I would be convinced that he didn’t care for me.  So can someone tell me why these motherfuckers were out in front of my damn window again on Tuesday morning?  Those bushes don’t grow so fucking fast that they need to be trimmed every week.  Hell, they could use some fertilizer and water because some of them look damned pitiful or in some stage of death.  But the what the hell do I know?  The thing that annoys me the most is that the Mexicants start and stop and the whole throttling and the smell of gas is annoying.  Oh on Tuesday my window was closed but still the racket was louder than a pack of nigglets at a weekend movie.

Tuesday night, just minutes before I was planning to call it a night, I ended up taking my mom to the E.R.  She burnt her leg while steaming some clothes.  She tried a few remedies and it was still bothering her.  I really wanted to tell her sorry I’m in my draws and done for the night, holla at me in the morning but I can’t do my mommy like that.  If the shoe was on the other foot I know she’d put on her cape and fly me to the hospital.  She’s done it before on more than one occassion.  Although in fairness I’m usually near death or seriously ill by the time I ask to go to the E.R.  I think we walked out of the E.R. just before 3 in the morning.  She’s fine.  I’ve been a nightowl since I was about 12 or 13 so usually it’s no big deal but with my interrupted or poor sleep the past few nights I felt like one of the walking dead.  I’ve always had difficulty sleeping away from home so my extended time away from home is going to be interesting.  Wish I had some strong sleeping pills.

Author: Freaky Deaky I'm a horny, opinionated, smart-ass, antisocial, introverted, misanthropic, agnostic, nonconformist, free thinking, hedonistic, highly intelligent, and arrogant black man with a dirty mind.