Wrath the Furious
1. People who apologize and expect you to forgive them and be back to normal on the spot. Fuck you dumbass! You pissed me off and/or hurt me on your time so please believe I’ll forgive you (or not) on my own time schedule not yours.
2. People begging for money. I can’t stand it when I’m just minding my own business and trying to get some groceries, pick up a prescription, or get some gas and someone is standing outside begging for money. I don’t really care what the cause is I don’t like people walking up on me and asking for money like they’re entitled for me to say anything other than get the fuck out of my face with that bullshit! I want pussy so how about I stand outside of CVS and follow your mama, little sister, wife, or girlfriend around and beg like the thirstiest bastard ever. You wouldn’t like that, would you?
3. People walking up on me to talk about their religion. Look, I don’t ambush you in the parking lot or come to your doorstep telling you why religion is a sham and God doesn’t exist so kindly extend me the same courtesy and keep that shit to yourself. I’ll holla at you if I have a question about your beliefs but otherwise quit trying to trick me by sending cute chicks up to me only to start reaching for pamphlets and shit. Unless your religion includes speaking in tongues while baptizing my dick in the back of your throat and drinking my baby juice then we don’t have anything to talk about.
4. People telling me how I should react to something. I’m not generally the type to turn cartwheels, jump up and down, or run around in circles hootin’ & hollerin’ with a shit eating grin on my face no matter how happy or excited I am about someone or something. Case in point, I walked in a fast food joint and saw someone I was cool with and hadn’t seen in years. She gave me a hug, we exchanged pleasantries, and phone numbers. Later when we talked she told me that her friend didn’t think I acted happy enough to see her. Who the fuck is she?! Was I supposed to hump her leg or snot up crying? That’s just not how I roll. If you want to know how I feel then ask. If I want to tell you or show you then I will but I’ll do it in my own way and according to my level of comfort.
5. Lurkers. I don’t understand how people will go through a category and read dozens of posts over several years but can’t even say hi. These same assholes then have the nerve to ask for passwords or to be unblocked. Fuck you and die in your sleep you rude fucktards!
6. Not keeping your word. If you say you’re going to e-mail some naked pics (or anything else) than do it (and in a timely manner). If you say you’re going to deliver something on a specific day or at a specific time then do so. I don’t care what comes up, what you have to sacrifice, or how much it’s going to cost to save face and do right by me but I expect you to keep your word! If not then don’t get mad when I treat you like your word is worth less than a wet, moldy food stamp because it pretty much is. I shouldn’t have to remind you to do something you volunteered or are contracted to do.
7. Being ignored. I require attention and a fair amount of it. I honestly don’t care about what else is going on in your life until you use it as an excuse for why I’m being neglected. Don’t care about your kid being sick, your husband being in the hospital, school kicking your ass, or work treating you like a Hebrew slave. Anything that takes away from my attention pisses me off and I wish ill of. It’s just my nature. If I can’t get it from you then I’ll seek it elsewhere and eventually won’t require your services at all.