You got something in your hair

I feel a little bad but I finally got around to read The Hunger Games.  I noticed the Google Play store was selling the book (in digital form) for $1.99 so I went over to Amazon to see if they were matching the price.  They were, so I decided to download it on my Kindle Fire.  I read it pretty quickly.  I was done with it in about two days.  Overall, I enjoyed the book.  It was much better than the movie, as is often the case.  I’ve seen the other books for $5.99 each.  It would be nice if I could get that $1.99 deal on those two but now I’m interested enough to buy them if they don’t drop in price further… next month.

Speaking of the Kindle Fire, I’m kind of underwhelmed with it.  Amazon doesn’t update it enough and I’m not really a fan of their appstore outside of the free app of the day gimmick.  I’m really eyeing the Google Nexus 7.  *whispers*  I’ve even coveted an iPad once or twice.  Well, until I come to the price.  My limit for a tablet is about $300 max.  Anymore and you’re pretty much in netbook/laptop/computer territory and you won’t convince me that one of those isn’t better than a tablet.  I mean you can try but really, you’ll have more success trying to convince someone that fat meat ain’t greasy.

I’m thinking that maybe I shouldn’t even answer my phone before noon.  Nine times out of 10 it won’t be any sort of good news.  Seriously, no one ever says, “Hey Freaky, come get some of this hot, wet pussy” before noon or “I got some money burning a hole in my pocket right now, do you want some of it?”  It’s usually something bad like “Hey Freaky, you might want to go see your doctor because my pussy has gangrene” or “Gangstas are going to blow my titties off with a shotgun if I don’t pay them back this loan, can you help me?”

The dating thing has come to a standstill.  I’m kind of in recluse mode now.  Right now I think it’s equal parts can’t be bothered to put in the work and I don’t want to.  Sometimes the whole back and forth of getting to know someone new can be so fun and exciting but most times, if I’m going to be honest, I find the process to be awkward and dreadfully boring.  At this point and time I feel more comfortable retreating than engaging so until I feel otherwise there isn’t any reason to continue trying at this point.  

I’m really looking forward to this pet adoption fair in about two weeks.  It seems like it’s taking forever to get here.  I kind of want a bulldog or a Shar Pei. As for the picture above, I can’t imagine any dog I’ve ever had would let that hairstyle go without trying to play tug-o-war or ripping it apart.  If they didn’t get to her hair I’d condition the fuck out of it with some original formula liquid Freaky.

Todd Akin disturbs me on several levels.  What the fuck is a legitimate rape?  How the fuck do people reach adulthood and not know simple science?  He kind of reminds me of those fools on Maury spouting off stupid shit as fact to prove why he isn’t the father.  Fox News actually found a woman who was conceived out of rape to agree that abortions, even in the case of rape or incest, should be banned.  I swear if I had Mitt Romney’s money, I wouldn’t be running for President.  I’d have most of my money in those off shore accounts he’s so familiar with and move to another country with a lower nutjob per capita rate.

I’ve never watched more than a minute or two of the show but I think I honestly want to kill, or at least violently assault, everyone on the TLC show Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.

I want a deep fryer.  I’ve been trying to bake fries lately but they never come out quite done enough for me.  I love french fries and I just haven’t had them like I did when I was in Michigan.  One thing I’ve noticed is that a lot of places don’t seem to cook them long enough.  Seriously they’re supposed to be at least golden brown not white.  I think you might have to order them well done here unless you like semi-raw potatoes dipped in hot grease and seasoned.  

Just because chicks of a certain type make my heart flutter doesn’t mean that you can’t get it too.  It’s too much pussy out there that I’m trying to get my dick wet in and paint to turn you down because of a couple of aesthetic points.  Now if your cooch smells putrid, has more hair on it than my face, or you’re so ugly I can’t even turn off the lights and pretend you’re someone prettier than I might turn down stabbing your slit.  Just like the chorus to a song I used to listen to back in the day, “Pussy ain’t got no face, no face, you gotta stick it in they pee hole.”  

Looks like a tribe of nigglets are moving in next door.  *sigh*  How the fuck did they afford to live here?   Hopefully, it’s more of the females and less of the dudes.  All I know is that I saw a gang of them hanging out outside.  Apparently some of them are from two doors down.  All I know is that when the white people near you move out you have about two years max before you start calling your neighborhood “Little (insert third world country or city)”.

I miss having a little female sidekick to adore me and to love up on.  

My GPS is either stupid or evil.  It appears that it has trouble telling directions.  The voice will tell me to turn left while the directions on the map will tell me to turn right.  It might be time to junk the TomTom and go back to Garmin.  I need to be given correct directions and I need them given in enough time for me to actually act on them.  

Now that I’m in the South I definitely want to try some moonshine before the end of the year.  I mean the good shit and not the stuff that makes you go blind.  

I kind of want Madden 13 for PS3.  I doubt I’ll buy it anytime soon though.  Damn, I can’t even remember the last time I bought a game for my PS3.  Honestly I use it mainly for Netflix and as a blu-ray player.  

I hate when people say shit like they miss me.  I’ve been around what about you?  It just reeks of insincerity to me because obviously you didn’t miss me enough to call, write, visit, etc.  Also if you really do miss me don’t call me boo when you tell me.  I hate being called boo but love sharing some boo goo.  

Author: Freaky Deaky I'm a horny, opinionated, smart-ass, antisocial, introverted, misanthropic, agnostic, nonconformist, free thinking, hedonistic, highly intelligent, and arrogant black man with a dirty mind.