Who invited Curt Conners & his family?

So my community had a pet adoption fair last Saturday.  I hardly slept the night before.  Seriously I’m talking 8 year old on Christmas Eve geeked!  As is the case most times with me, it seems, the hype failed to live up to my anticipation.  There were about six or seven dogs and at least as many cats on the lawn outside of the clubhouse and I was honestly disappointed.  The dogs looked kind of sad and pathetic.  Part of me was hoping that they hadn’t finished setting up yet and that more dogs and puppies were waiting somewhere I couldn’t see to be brought in.  Unfortunately, that really wasn’t the case.  The neighborhood dogs were more interesting.  There was a Boxer and a Great Dane.  The Great Dane was very curious and friendly but because of his size none of the dogs there were feeling him.  The Boxer snapped at the Great Dane when he got to close and the Great Dane didn’t even seem to notice or care.  He had a cool vest with goggles attached to them and this is coming from someone that generally despises people who dress dogs.  Anyway, I’ll have to keep perusing Craigslist or take a trip down to the shelter, I guess.  Of course that means my pet deposit and fees won’t be waived.  There was an older, fat lady in a wheelchair with the rescue sponsoring the adoption fair.  I got bad vibes about her especially when she started screaming nein at two dogs that started snipping at each other in the cage.

I used to smack my dog Tantrum on her haunches and repeatedly scream nein!  Nein, by the way, is German for no in case you didn’t know.  It wasn’t anything out of anger just a rhythmic tapping while screaming nein.  The looks I used to get from that dog when I did it.  LOL.  *looks around and then whispers*  I do that to Val too sometimes.  She raises an eyebrow and looks at me like I’m special.  I am special and I’m not talking the specially educated special either.

Seems like I’m having a bit of a pest problem.  For the second day in a row a lizard or salamander, though I’m thinking it’s a lizard has infiltrated my home.  My guess is they’re getting in from underneath the door.  The weatherproofing strip or whatever has seen better days so first thing in the morning their will be a call into management.  I’m not really a nature person.  Truth be told, I generally hate being outdoors for prolonged periods of time most of the time.  My standard operating practice is generally to shoo it away if it’s outside and as long as you don’t fuck with me then I won’t fuck with you.  That goes out the door once you come inside my place.  If you’re close enough to a door then I may shoo you back out but if you’re unlucky enough to be discovered away from a door then you pretty much have to die.  There is no relocation just the one true death in your future.  The one last night was fortunate enough to get to the patio door.  Unfortunately, the screen on that door didn’t make it.  What?  I don’t like crawly things.  The previous lizard was poisoned to death.  Makes me want a dog even more to kill them though with my luck it will be terrified of them and immediately seek the safety of my lap.  *sigh*  Anyway, yeah, I know lizards are beneficial and in some places seeing one inside is a side of good luck but I’m from Detroit and if it is anything other than a baby or a dog crawling or scurrying about my floor then it needs to die, period.  Where are the feral cats at when you need them?

Found out at the adoption fair that there are a few colonies of feral cats on the grounds.  I’ve mainly seen them by the dumpsters.  Anyway, the people gave out some literature about trapping the cats, getting them spayed or neutered, and releasing them back.  That seems similar to buying birth control for a chick you’re not fucking, driving her to fuck random dudes, then taking her home without so much as a handjob or some thank you throat.  Nope, can’t help you but hope everything works out for you.  

The check engine light on my SUV came on last Thursday.  Saturday the check engine light randomly turned off.  I have no idea what that was about.    *shrugs*   I also found out a recall has been issued on my make and model SUV due to a potential issue with fire and the power windows or something.  Apparently the issue is specific to SUVs in Michigan.  So far they haven’t sent me any type of notification. Well, guess I’ll find out more about it soon.  I kind of wish it was an excuse for me to get something new.  Yeah, I know that’s unlikely to happen.  I can still dream.  

We’ve had good sleeping weather the past several days.  I haven’t even needed the a/c and have slept pretty damn well with the windows open.  The weather has even been downright pleasant in the afternoons too.  Probably the most pleasant since I’ve moved here.  Makes me wonder what fall and winter are going to be like.  

Can’t wait for the fall TV season to start.  I’ve pretty much seen everything on TV that I’ve wanted to watch.  I’m ready for some new shows and some new episodes.  I’m ready to start feeling a show only for it to go on hiatus and never come back because it was canceled.  If I like a show there’s a 50/50 chance of it getting canceled.  If my mom likes the show too then it’s at least a 75% chance it’s going to be canceled within six episodes.

Rumor is the phone I’ve been waiting for, the Samsung Galaxy Note 2, is coming in October.  I’ve been wanting a new phone for awhile now.  I even considered going over to the darkside, becoming an iSheep and getting an iPhone.  Oh I won’t.  Maybe by the time the 9th or 10th generation iPhone is released it’ll have a big enough screen for me.  I can’t see myself going with anything smaller than a 4.5 inch screen now and the phone I want is bigger.  I have big hands but when I played with the original Galaxy Note at Sam’s Club even I had to say, “Damn, that’s a big ass phone!”  It’s thinner than my current phone but I can see how a phone that thin could snap in someone’s pocket or explode if dropped.  I’m also kind of feeling the Nokia Lumia 920, though I’m not sure I’m ready to jump to a Microsoft phone yet.  Now if Sprint would just upgrade their network already.  I wish I could get a new one every year.  Hell, I wish I could swap out phones at least every six months.  My mom liked the Galaxy S III.  

My latest mobile game addiction is Word Hero.  It’s a word search game that has kept me up to the wee hours of the night trying to improve my score.  

Football season is finally back but since moving it hasn’t been the same.  I miss my Lions.  I haven’t been able to care about the local team yet.  I wish I had DirecTV so I could watch all of the Lions’ games instead of having to wait for one of their nationally televised games.  Fortunately, there will be a few of them this season.  You know what team I care about even less than the local team?  The Washington Redskins.  I don’t care if they’re closer I’d rather watch the Lions.

Val reminded me that I have a milestone birthday coming up next year.  I’m kind of dreading it and haven’t really thought too much about it.  With my birthday being less than three weeks away I’m sure I’ll be thinking about next year’s birthday a lot for the next year.  I guess I should do something memorable for it.  If only the sex tours weren’t so expensive.  I’d love to paint the insides of some foreign born pussies.  

 

Author: Freaky Deaky I'm a horny, opinionated, smart-ass, antisocial, introverted, misanthropic, agnostic, nonconformist, free thinking, hedonistic, highly intelligent, and arrogant black man with a dirty mind.