Grammar slam

 

I sympathize with people who are learning English as a second language. I’ve had a lot of foreign pen pals and homophones are a bitch! I’m not a grammar Nazi because most of the time it is just not that serious.  Also, when one tends to play grammar police to intimidate or insult people they have a tendency of making glaring errors themselves and looking like ginormous assclowns!  I figure as long as I can understand the message you’re trying to express then we’re good.  I do hold some people to higher standards though like businesses, for example.  I would never sign a contract with a bunch of glaring and obvious errors or in which the grammar made material concepts and understanding it vague.  I have in the past refused to even consider patronizing certain businesses after reading their ads because I couldn’t take them seriously and questioned their professionalism and business acumen.  I figure if you don’t care enough to proofread your figurehead, ads, or whatever then you probably don’t care about getting my order right, protecting my information, or not clubbing cute little baby seals.  Okay, that last one is a bit of jump but you never know.  

 

 

We all have our struggles though.  I can’t for the life of me get into text lingo unless I’m exhausted, mad at the person texting, or I don’t want to bothered but I’m still trying to maintain some semblance of politeness.  People who text me on the regular are used to getting multi-part texts from me.  Outside of texting, Twitter, or having to pay per letter I think text lingo is inappropriate and unacceptable when conversing with me.  This isn’t Wheel of Fortune, so you don’t have to pay for vowels.  LOL.  One person in particular irks me when texting.  I can get through any spelling or grammar errors 99% of the time and still understand what that person intended to say but let me make one simple mistake and I pretty much have to retype the whole damn message because this person seemingly lacks the ability to consider context clues or inference.  *sigh*  I’ve seriously wanted to throw my phone at the wall and scream sometimes.

 

 

Who/Whom trips me up. I think it’s mainly due to the fact that outside of academia I don’t know many people who use whom enough to bother remembering the rules of proper usage. I used to try to incorporate it into conversation more but it either put off people or I got tired of being called fancypants, snobbish, and proper. *shrugs* The whole comma/semi-colon thing gets misused a lot. I generally know the proper usage of them but *whispers* I have a confession, I don’t really like semi-colons because even when they’re used properly, they look wrong to me. Well, that and most people I know don’t appreciate it if I use them or not. Fortunately, in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter if most of us don’t have the grammar of an Ivy league English professor or those 10 year old spelling bee champions would wipe the floor us. I mainly posted this because I love C.M. Punk, he’s one of my favorite wrestlers, and a lot of assholes on the Internet make these common mistakes when trolling. Again, it’s not that serious, I was just thinking out loud and giving my inner nerd a little face time.

 

 

Do you have any grammar or spelling pet peeves?

 

Author: Freaky Deaky I'm a horny, opinionated, smart-ass, antisocial, introverted, misanthropic, agnostic, nonconformist, free thinking, hedonistic, highly intelligent, and arrogant black man with a dirty mind.