Movies

My movie going has seriously fallen off big time.  I think I’ve only been to the movies twice so far this year, to see Furious 7 and Avengers: Age of Ultron.  I love the Fast & Furious franchise for the most part, Tokyo Drift notwithstanding, but I think it’s time to either do spin-offs or end the franchise.  Furious 7 wasn’t as good as 6 and with Paul Walker gone it’s time to call it a wrap.  The CGI that they used to insert Paul Walker at the end of the movie was wack.  I’ve seen more life like video games and animation.  That CGI Paul Walker looked soulless to me and honestly freaked me out a little.  They can do so much with the explosions, stunts, and destruction and they just let that thing ruin a nice ending.  Honestly, it should’ve just ended on the beach. I’m still waiting to get the whole series on a box set on blu-ray.  It would make a nice birthday, Christmas, or thanks for painting my insides present.  What?!

I planned on seeing Age of Ultron Friday but I was trying to see it with Val.  Unfortunately, her availability wasn’t much to be desired and I didn’t want to wait a week or longer to see it.  I ended up taking my mom.  Don’t know if I ever mentioned it but I probably got my love for movies from my mom, specifically horror and sci-fi.  I’m pretty sure she got into the super hero movies due to my influence.  I got her hooked on Arrow and Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. too.  Surprisingly, she hasn’t gotten into The Flash, which is a great show so check it out!  You’re welcome!  She’s one of the few women I know that doesn’t act all scary about seeing a horror movie.  I can’t really deal with a chick who can do a gore splattered horror movie on a stormy weekend night at two in the morning because she’s scared.  It just makes me want to roll my eyes and say, “If you want me to take off your big girls panties then you have to actually put them on first.”  Hate scary chicks!

Anyway, Age of Ultron was cool.  I didn’t necessarily like the movie’s depiction of Ultron though.  I knew it was going to be different when they announced James Spader (from NBC’s The Blacklikst, an excellent show, by the way) was cast to play the titular villain.  Honestly, the cartoon version of Ultron is a lot scarier and menacing.  The movie version of Ultron was played more erratic and mentally unstable as opposed to the cold and evil android I’m used to.  It also seemed like there was less fighting though I haven’t compared both Avengers movies to support my opinion.  I think half of the team was underutilized in the morning and I felt bad about Hawkeye’s “secret”.  It was Tony Stark and Captain America heavy but I’m guessing they went with that to seed the Captain America: Civil War movie.  I’d like to see The Avengers fight someone who isn’t a robot so I’m hopeful about Avengers 3 & 4 also known as The Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 & 2.   Thanos is a badass!

Concession prices are fucking ridiculous!  If I took anyone other than my mother and paid those prices then I’d expect a movie theater handjob or for my date to be molested.  To think I used to have a problem going to the movies by myself.  It’s easier because I don’t have to coordinate with someone else’s schedule.  Nine times out of 10, I just want to go when I want to go. I don’t want to figure out logistics or wait for someone to be presentable.  The more decisions you want me to make, the more I want to just go by myself and text you when I get back.  LOL.

Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice looks like it’s going to be a total clusterfuck, but I’m still going to see it next year. They’re squeezing too many people into it rushing to set up a Justice League movie.  Let’s see who’s supposed to be in it so far:  Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Cyborg, The Flash, Lex Luthor, and Doomsday.  That doesn’t even include all the other rumored wink and a nod or blink and you’ll miss them cameos.  I’m also not impressed with Ben Affleck’s armored Batsuit and his angry Batman voice.  I thought Christian Bale’s rapey (yeah, I said rapey) Batman voice took some getting used to.  I hate Lex Luthor as a movie villain, add him to the list with Magneto, Dr. Doom, and Norman Osbourne/Green Goblin as overused villains that need to be given a rest.

There’s at least a half dozen movies on my radar over the next 8 weeks.  I’m going to try to get my Ash Ketchum on and catch’em all.  We’ll see.

What movies have you seen recently?  What are you looking forward to seeing?

Author: Freaky Deaky I'm a horny, opinionated, smart-ass, antisocial, introverted, misanthropic, agnostic, nonconformist, free thinking, hedonistic, highly intelligent, and arrogant black man with a dirty mind.