5ive things I shouldn’t want, but I do:
1. A stalker. (A hot stalker who hides in the bushes, shows up unexpectedly, blows up my phone, and will stay obsessed with me no matter how many times I fuck and ignore her and fuck her friends. And not any wack ass Internet stalker either.)
2. To be the other man. (Nice guys finish last. Sometimes I want to embrace the bastard in me and let the darker/less moral aspects of my personality come out front and center.)
3. To piss in and on a bitch. (Don’t ask me why?)
4. A father figure/mentor/role model.
5. At least triple the amount of regular comments I currently get.
5ive Smurfs you’ve never heard of:
1. Baby Daddy Smurf (Who dat is? That’s just my Baby Daddy Smurf.)
2. Junkie Smurf (He’ll suck your Smurf!)
3. Zombie Smurf (Dopey used to be in MENSA before Zombie nibbled on his brains.)
4. Prison Bitch Smurf (He’s never out of jail for more than a couple of hours.)
5. Stalker Smurf (If he can’t have you then no Smurf can.)
5ive things gang bangers can fight over other than colors:
1. Puppies.
2. Candy.
3. Cell phone providers.
4. Care Bears.
5. Hair styles.
5ive wrestling holds/moves I’d love to randomly apply to unsuspecting people:
1. Figure four leg lock.
2. Chair shot.
3. Backstabber/Code Breaker.
4. Clothesline.
5. Knife edge chop (followed by a loud Ric Flair “whooo!”)
5ive children songs Lil Wayne & T-Pain have yet to rape & bastardize with a wack ass remix:
1. Frère Jacques.
2. Mary Had a Little Lamb.
3. Patty Cake.
4. Old MacDonald.
5. Bingo.
I used to wish Smurfs came in different colors other than blue when I was little. I liked variety even at a young age. lol They should have had a bi-racial Smurf. Can you just imagine what a cross-breed of a Smurf and Gumby would look like. :))
I wish they would’ve had shows where they play peeping Tom outside of Smurfette’s mushroom.
“Can you just imagine what a cross-breed of a Smurf and Gumby would look like.” Somewhat retarded would be my guess. :))
you’re mind is so damn random! lol
Sometimes it is but I generally try not to have the 5ives follow a theme by design. 🙂
I can help you with the comments. But me posting the same thing three times is gonna look kinda retarded! :-??
Piss in? On I can see. In? :-
LMAO @ them Smurfs!!! =))
Did you say five things gang bangers can fight over or five things that butt bangers can fight over? :p
Aw man I am so with you on that Figure Four Leg Lock. Just drop it on folk all unsuspecting… You know that Camel Clutch and the Sharpshooter are cool too! :d
I think Weezy is practicing how to fuck up B-I-N-G-O B-I-N-G-O B-I-N-G-O… :((
It would also mean my duplicate filter is broken. :))
I sometimes read a sex blog where the guy talks about piss play sessions sometimes. He made it sound like phone. I doubt I could or would ever try it with someone I care about but if another random chick asks for my piss I may give it to her…at her place. =)) I’m not doing that shit here.
Gang bangers become butt bangers in prison so you can say it’s for both.
LOL @ the camel clutch. You have to talk some shit while you’re applying it too. I’d have to knock someone out while I figured out how to do the sharpshooter. I’ve seen it often enough but I could see getting confused while trying to apply it.
I’m sure he is and he better have my money for the idea too.
Baby Daddy Smurf (Who dat is? That’s just my Baby Daddy Smurf.) =))
To piss in and on a bitch. (that’s just some foul shit)
You know Nanny Smurf, Smurfette, and Sassette were hoeing on the side. Smurf Village was a straight up sausage party. I’m sure Tailor and Vanity swallowed some blue pussy pokers a time or too and you know Brainy was bi.
Sharing is caring Sheree. That’s never foul. [-(
“5. At least triple the amount of regular comments I currently get.”
Don’t feel you get enough as is? Would you actually have the time to respond to each and everyone?
Honestly, I don’t feel I get as many comments as I should or could and not nearly as many as I deserve when compared to other blogs.
I don’t know. It would be a nice problem to have regardless though. 🙂
smh
u aint never lied man
tpain and wayne need a time out
I only wish I could travel back in time and shake both of them really, really hard as babies.
Not that you wanna R Kelly a bitch :))
Can gangbangers fight over who is the hardest lol ?
you forgot a wrestling move The 5 fingers say to the face death wrap lmao
R. Kelly is base, stupid (did you see that interview?), and way too fucking old to still be wearing braids. I just want to share some of the other Liquid Freaky with a lucky chick in need of some golden love.
They’re fighting over colors like fucking Rainbow Brite and her Sprites. Nope, they can’t fight over who’s harder. They can however fight over who’s gayer and who gets to grab their ankles and bite the pillow.
That’s martial arts. :))
Mary had a little lamb and bingo are coming…just as soon as lollipop is off the air…
Stalkers aren’t fun. I had one before, some scary shit.
What exactly is the backstabber/code breaker move??? I need to try some of those moves…hmmm…
Why does twitter keep asking me for a user name/password? I don’t have one…
Lollipop is a stupid song. I could mention all of the homoerotic overtones to the song (especially considering the rapper involved) but I won’t. 🙂 I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if someone did a remix of one of those songs. Hell, if I could rap I’d do it just because I’d be arrogant enough to think I could make money off of it.
Everyone who has had one has told me that I don’t want one. She’d be fun for my attention whore days. Maybe not so much when I go into hermit recluse mode. Oh well.
Codebreaker (http://www NULL.dailymotion NULL.com/video/x3th3w_codebreaker-on-marella_sport) The Backstabber is basically the same thing but is done behind the other person.
I passworded my Twitter over the weekend because people keep trying to follow me and keep their shit private. Although since most link to their blogs it’s still easy enough to read anyway. I’ll take it down later.
A stalker for a guy might be different then a stalker for a girl. All I know is it wasn’t fun trying to get my stalker off my tail when he tried to follow me home…and unfortunately, I worked with him and knew who he was…and I wasn’t amused when he threatened to kill me in third person.
I got management involved and eventually he disappeared…but it was a long time before I could stop looking over my shoulders and finally feel safe again.
Ok, I don’t think I want to try the codebreaker, lol, that kinda looked painful. I don’t watch wrestling, so it’s all news to me. D tried to edumakate me on Saturday when I couldn’t sleep and was bored enough to watch it with him…but come Sunday I forgot everything he taught/explained to me. I just don’t have the attention span for it. Oh well.:-??
I’m assuming he didn’t know about your black belt or taser? I don’t think I’d stalk a chick that could kick my ass.
I’ve heard some crazy stories about female stalkers. With my luck she’d be pretty formidable but part of me would dig a chick being that obsessed with me. Well, until I wanted to be left alone and it got annoying.
Yeah, I chose things that could legitimately hurt and didn’t require the other person’s cooperation.
No, he didn’t know that I trained in martial arts (or sports) or had other family members that were black belts, lol.
I didn’t have a taser back then, lol…too bad, coulda practiced on him. :d
Don’t know what makes me more nervous. The thought of you with a taser or the fact that you’re from a family of ninjas.
LMAO, you shouldn’t be nervous. The first thing they teach you is to walk away from a fight unless it is truly self defense. I don’t waste my time unless I have to. 🙂
Ninjas don’t walk away. They just lurk in the shadows and kill you later. :))
I am definitely more nervous about the family of Ninja.
We all are.
Very true…I’ve lurked and pounced before, but hey, what can I say…I (we) don’t always follow instructions, hehe. I would say my brother is far more dangerous than I. Mr. seems so nice and sweet, tall and slender, could easily kill you before you knew what was coming. I’m glad he’s on my team! LMAO
You are officially my shero and blog bodyguard now. 😀
I would love to do the cross face chicken wing move on a couple of people.
Please don’t give Lil Wayne or TPain any ideas.
Now that would be funny. If you ever do it please have someone take video of it. I need to see it. :d
You know you’ll be dancing to it at the club. =))